Look, I'm not going to bag on Jessica Simpson's weight here. I'm just going to go on record as stating that a professional PR team wouldn't send her out in a white corset to reassert her sexy street cred.
I'm just sayin'.
**High Profile Media handles Van Halen currently and is/was the brainchild of EVH's fiance, who got into the business as a publicist for a mid-level porn distribution company. He's not even raiding the best the porn world has to offer. Even HPM could figure this out.