Friday, April 17, 2009

Boob Week - Day 2

1. Jennifer Love Hewitt – This young lady is back in the press with a Maxim cover (does anyone actually read this shit?). She’s pretty and she continues our Boob Week theme, but who really cares? The blogosphere will complain about her weight and the rest of the real world will say, ‘Hmm, looks good’ and life will go on. I do give her limited props for not getting naked just because everyone seems to think that’s all she’s got to offer, but c’mon, no one is waiting around for the sequel to Heartbreakers.

2. Modern Day Pirates – I’ve written about this briefly in the past but this new trend of modern-day piracy is just kicking my ass. These geniuses are taking on the most sophisticated and powerful navy the world has ever seen with a motorboat and machetes. Good for them. As long as they are flying the Jolly Roger, then I’m cool with them; but when the SEALS go all crazy on them, maybe they should stop the threats and just go ride the Pirates of the Caribbean at Disneyland and avoid the whole death thing.

3. Octomom TM – Word is the Octomom wants to trademark her name. Good for her. That whole ‘get enough plastic surgery to look like Angelina Jolie’ thing didn’t work out for her; the ‘have octuplets and live on endorsements’ didn’t work out for her; now her ‘trademark the name Octomom and live off of royalties’ plan is next. I’ve got news for her: No one cares. Short of jumping off of the Golden Gate Bridge, nothing this woman can do should interest anyone living in the United States of America. That would be the best thing for those kids though. Where’s Hulk Hogan at when you need him?

4. Where does he find the time? Apparently Mel Gibson has been linked to six women over the past few years, including noted crazy-woman Brittney Spears. Throw in the fact he has nearly a billion dollars and has only made one movie in that time, I’d have to say that number seems low.

5. Cheer Coach Bunny – Why is it that every female teacher I’ve ever dealt with looks like they were in the original cast of “Grease” or “Little House on the Prarie?” Apparently, previously posing for Playboy is not good for young women who would like to work in the schools. Who woulda thunk it?


diane said...

I love JLH. She is cute and has a great body. And she isn't a whore or sell out (yet).
Modern day pirates sound so sexy - until you see them. At least the idea is still nice.

Renee said...

I was worried Boob Week might turn me into a lesbian, but it turns out I don't feel anything towards JLH, except maybe that I wish I had cute bangs like hers.

I don't fully understand number 5, but I'm afraid to ask.

Pirates are officially over. We're into Vampires now Diane, haven't you heard? Until a group of Real Vampires tries to take on the Marines. Then we'll move onto Zombies. Always everything in its time....

Sheri_Beri said...

JLH looks GREAT in those pictures. But you're right, her acting skills are not the business.

I need a sugar daddy. I wonder if there's an opening for that with Mel?? lol

Anonymous said...

JLH: I won't switch teams for her either...

Octomom: How much does she think she can capitalize on procreation? Aren't the other 6 odd billion of us on earth, proof that having babies (one or more) is not a big achievement?


Kristin said...

Count me in on not understanding #5, either.

I hadn't heard that about Mel and Brit Brit, but I can't say it surprises me. He's so screwed.

Octomom....I avoid stories about her at all costs, because while she's a freak show, there's innocent kids involved and that's just not fun to watch.

JLH - she bugs. I just think of her as horribly desperate to wind up in the tabloids for ANY reason, and not above calling the paps to show up while she's "shopping". I never watched her stupid shows, so I can't comment on her acting ability.